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Additional resources for A Sensitive Liberal's Guide to Life: How to Banter with Your Barista, Hug Mindfully, and Relate to Friends Who Choose Kids Over Dogs

Sample text

You could be a real woman or a real man, but the point is you’re real. Just like the people we’re going to hear from in a little bit. They’re real, and so are their transportation questions. First though, I’ve got to let you in on some secrets that you may find shocking. Shockingly thoughtful, that is! Confessions of a pedestrianphile I may have a car, but I use it for essential services only. I plan to mulch it the moment this city deigns to provide wild salmon at a reasonable price within walking distance of my town home.

I may smile up at you as I glide by your ankles. My smile says, “Waiting for the bus, eh? Consider a recumbent bike! ” But for now, please grab a handrail, because your current mode of transportation is the high-speed glass elevator in which we’ll tour the Hierarchy. Starting at the very bottom: Cars They’re undoubtedly a force for evil, yet some of us are stuck with cars. Purely out of necessity. I myself have a Prius I purchased with the money from the sale of my Subaru Legacy to a Somali family.

It’s just terrible what happens over there. So much misunderstanding and hatred. If you don’t mind, I’d rather not get too far into the specifics. It’s pretty complex, after all. What’s that? Why does every American politician feel compelled to reaffirm unconditional support for Israel, you ask? And how is it even possible to negotiate with a group like Hamas? Um, excuse me, but those sound like pretty loaded questions. Is there something offensive lurking behind those questions? Because if so, I am fully prepared to be offended.

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